Under the Banner

Not a Popularity Contest

2009-12-08T15:44:00.002-07:00

In High School I would religiously write down my outfit each day as to not have any fashion repeats within a two week period. Heaven forbid I walk into first period wearing the same sweater I had on last week! Think of my reputation! Think of all the girls who would roll their eyes at me snickering to each other, "OMG! She's totally wearing a repeat!"

I've come a long way, but the truth is a lot of us desire the acceptance and approval of those around us. We formulate decisions, even life altering ones, based on what other people think. It oppresses our freedom, our giftings, and ultimately our joy.

When decisions are approaching I tend to flop like a fish out of water wondering what is the best. Sometimes instead of going to God and ultimately obeying him, I ask friends, family, people I sit next to on airplanes (seriously) if they have opinions of what I should do. Of course they do! And then I flop around some more, only further from a pool of water.

The other day while flying back from my brother's wedding in Virginia, I read about Amaziah, a king of Judah, who made some decisions that made some people mad. Instead of wanting popularity, he decided obedience to God was far better.

Amaziah was going to war and decided to hire 100,000 troops from Israel for 100 talents of silver to help him fight the battle. A man of God approached Amaziah with this message: "O king, these troops from Israel must not march with you, for the Lord is not with Israel-not with any of the people of Ephraim. Even if you go and fight courageously in battle, God will overthrow you before the enemy, for God has the power to help or to overthrow." (2 Chronicles 25:8-9)

Amaziah kind of complains saying, "But what about the hundred talents of silver I paid for the Israelite troops?" To which the man of God replied, "The Lord can give you much more than that."

So Amaziah decides to trust God's ability to win the battle with less men and with less money in his pocket and out of obedience he sends the Israelite troops home. Their response? "They were furious with Judah and left home in a great rage." (2 Chronicles 25:10)

Amaziah wasn't looking to win a popularity contest with people. Amaziah didn't change his mind when he saw people were furious at him. He remained obedient to God.

Being obedient to God doesn't mean you'll make the popular decision. It doesn't guarantee rejoicing from those around you when God intercepts and changes your plans. But it does guarantee you God's best.

Popularity contests are thriving within our culture. I pray we would always choose obedience to God.

We didn't start the fire

2009-10-27T11:08:00.006-06:00

I remember running toward the thick black smoke through the maze of condos a few months ago. Coming back from an afternoon hike I saw the dark cloud, heard the sirens, and instinctively knew my life was changing.

When I arrived and saw the flames pilaging the inside of the condos three things went through my mind: 1. Oh my gosh, all my stuff is gone. . .and I'm wearing my ancient faded green shorts. 2. Did I start the fire?! and 3. "You will keep in perfect peace him whos mind is steadfast, because he trust in you." Isaiah 26:3

After the initial shock, I went around interviewing people to try and discover the cause of the fire. "Excuse me, did I start the fire?!" I'd ask. Hmm, perhaps I should have thought through my statements a little better. And why didn't I pick my favorite pair of jeans to go hiking in.

In a few short hours, my life was becoming exceedingly more complex, yet more simple. I was immediately awarded the coveted "minimalist" title that had been held since birth by my friend, Suz.

What I experienced that afternoon was an angelic chorus of provision surrounding my soul. Theresa, a stranger, cradled me in her arms and sung sweet prayers over me. My friend Kim sat on the grass with me for hours while I made phone calls and talked to firemen. Allison, another friend, came up to me and said, "I want to be here for you, and I'll stay if you need me, but would you like me to go get you some underwear?" I laughed-so thoughtful! "Yes, please, and a cell phone charger." "Done," she replied, and she was off. That evening I had cookies waiting for me, dozens of housing offers, and a tiny stuffed panda bear from a three year old girl who heard mine had perished in the fire.

The blessings didn't stop at 12:01 the next day. No. For the next two months I saw the Family of God rally around me and generously giving and providing. From towels to dishes, to gift cards to money, to meals and beds, I was flooded with love.

I am so grateful for my God and his people. I am so humbled. What the Psalmist said is true, "The Lord has done great things for [me] and I am filled with joy." Psalm 126:3

Posing in front my my condo in the infamous survior shorts and my 'life is good' towel.

A little roommate reunion: I lived with these beautiful women in 2270 Stepping Stones Way (prefire, that is).

Flowers in the In-Box

2009-09-27T15:56:00.004-06:00

Yes, I am a girl, but I did grow up with a brother and one Christmas he received one of those matchbox car tracks that had these little battery operated rubber wheels that provided continual propulsion of the miniature vehicle through the course. For hours you could watch the little red convertibles and the yellow dump trucks cruise the track and just when it would lose a bit of momentum, the little rubber wheels would send it speeding forward once again.

I believe God is always with us and he is always at work, but sometimes we forget it or we don’t feel it. And we slow down, but at just the right moment God lets us in on a little work that he’s been doing that fills us with courage to keep running in life.

If you’ve been a part of my life and ministry you have heard about Christina, my UCCS friend, who came to Jesus last fall and is beginning to walk a brisk pace down his path. God gave me a little push this morning to remind me, and hopefully you, that our labor in Him is not in vain.

Hey Lauren-I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate you meeting with
me one on one to learn more about the bible and Jesus. I know that life is busy
for you and I so greatly appreciate you taking time to meet with me!! I love our
time together and I have so much fun with you!!! Thank you so much again for
meeting with me and taking time to hang. I have learned so much from you and
your different lessons and for that I am forever grateful. Thank you for
everything that you do and I love chilling with you!! You are one of the most
amazing people I have ever met. Enjoy your Sunday and get some sunshine today!
(it will remind you of FL...he he he) Christina

This email was more delicious to my soul than a Sunday morning large buttery Lucille’s biscuit (even with rhubarb jam). It was like a bouquet of flowers in my in-box from God telling me, I love you, and I am using you to bring glory to my name.

God, thank you for the flowers, and may you continue to send them my way and the way of my friends at just the right time

Oh The Places You'll Go

2009-09-04T15:23:00.000-06:00

My freshman year at Florida State, Dr. Suess' book Oh the Places You'll Go was read to me in such an unusual place. My biology lab instructor pulled the book out in one of our final classes and read us the whimsical words of a playful poet. He encouraged the group of naively confident 18 year olds that we had places that we were to go. I agreed. And I even had ideas and presumptions of where these places would be and when I would arrive, and maybe imagined to the degree of what outfit I'd be sporting upon arrival.

Looking back at the past 8 years of my life hasn't looked as cookie cutter as I dreamed up in that biology lab while sitting next to the flour beetles in little glass test tubes (side note: our flour beetles failed to reproduce as fast as other groups' beetles, therefore, while they were trying to count the dozens of family beetle members crawling all over the table, our group neatly contained our American Dream Nuclear Beetle Family: Dad, Mom, and 2.5 kids; that's right 2.5, someone went cannibalistic.) By my 18 year old standards, my life has been messy, unorganized, poorly timed, and why don't I have 2.5 kids yet?!

Feeling nostalgic, I reread Dr. Suess's poem, and was caught by this stanza:

"You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.Some windows are
lighted. But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow
and chin!Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?How much can you
lose? How much can you win?
And IF you go in, should you turn left or
right...or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?Or go around back and
sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,for a
mind-maker-upper to make up his mind."

I have come to a place where the future is not clear, where there is no logical decision on where to go or what to do. I may very well sprain my elbow or chin, and I may even lose some, but I may even win. Summer ended, my apartment burned down, I began a relationship with a wonderful man, I have no job, and I certainly do not know where I am headed.

And I am in smack in the middle of making life decisions that may alter the course of my life. But then I am reminded with verses like Proverbs 21:30: There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the LORD. Chew on that for awhile. So I am humbled in realizing that, yes, I will make decisions that will affect where I live, what I do, who I'm around, but really, God is bigger. (Can I get an amen?)

The big question in mind was, do I stay or do I go?! Do I leave The Navigators, or do I stay with them? After seeking the Lord through prayer, his word, and godly counsel, I have decided (drum roll please) to do part time work with The Navigators. I cannot deny my passion for reaching college students for the sake of Christ. I connect with them, I love them, and they are in desperate need of Jesus. So I want to stay. But I also have a big heart to work in a secular environment. So I am off to do both! What a journey this will be!

I am returning to Colorado Springs and will be living there and working with The Navigators at UCCS this fall. I will also be looking for a job. That means my work dress code just change dramatically! From jeans and flip flops to grown up clothes I will go. The great part is my apartment fire cleared the way for me to get these new, more professional threads.

But I am completely satisfied, because this is an adventure, and one that I did not write, nor is the pen in my hand even now. At 26 there are still a million decisions ahead of me and yes's and no's that will be said, prayers of petitions and help to be prayed, and wise counsel to be sought. Whew. And at 27 there will be more decisions, and at 28, and at 29, and maybe not at 30, I mean, we all need a break now and again, but definitely at 31.

The point is, I'm seeking God, and he's leading me. I am blind, but he promises to lead the blind. I am thankful.

"Congratulations! Today is your day. You're off to Great Places! You're off and away!"
-Dr. Suess

Summer Time: Bite-Sized Highlights

2009-09-04T14:21:00.007-06:00

Describing the events and of Snow Mountain Ranch Summer Training Program 2009 would certainly send anyone into a spiritual coma and make them late to work, so I've decided to boil down STP into a few bite sized highlights to encourage you and get your heart racing down the track of thanksgiving.

Highlight One: The Students!!

I had the privilege of training 75 students from various college campuses! They were hilarious and so much fun to be around. They also possessed incredible hearts and teachable spirits.

I loved sharing meals with them!

Highlight Two: Hannah and Laura

These are the women I met with one on one all summer. They were Team Leaders and had a great responsibility in passing on all the tools they learned to their team members. I loved meeting with Hannah and Laura and discussing life and the Bible with them over icecream and walks.

Highlight Three: Serving the Students!

Here Jamie, Leigh Ann, and I are making S'mores for the students. Our campfire got rained out but that didn't ruin our fun! I also helped run our student ministry Nav Night and set up various events all summer to encourage and bless the students.

Highlight Four: Baptizing Robyn!

Robyn is a freshman from UCCS who just became a believer this spring. She decided to come to STP this summer to learn more about God and at the end of the summer she approached me and my teammate, Jamie, asking us if we would baptize her. Robyn is a joy!

Highlight Five: UCCS STUDENTS!

We had 14 UCCS students come to STP this summer!! How fantastic is that! I was praying for four to come! These students learned incredible tools on how to disciple, serve, lead, share Christ, and work hard and now they are back on campus living out what they learned.

Summer Time: The Great Outdoors

2009-07-08T15:46:00.004-06:00

Oh the places we go when in Colorado's back country!

This summer has been nothing short of outdoor adventures. There are plently of miles to log in the National Forests and Parks surrounding us and it's a blast to take students along. Our conversations have roamed the great expanse of the mind including topics of God, life lessons, dating, embarassing moments, and maybe an occasionaly corny joke.

Summer Time: Humble Beginnings

2009-06-30T15:52:00.003-06:00

This marvelous and attractive young bunch are the Team Leaders and Navigator Staff that are up here in Granby, Colorado working hard and learning about Jesus. These are our humble beginnings back in May!! We took a hike and learned about the history of The Navigators. (By the way, before you go cross eyed looking for me, I'm smack dab in the middle. Sorry all you Where's Waldo fans for giving away the answer so casually. Maybe we'll have round two later.)

Currently I am meeting with two of the girl Team Leaders: Hannah from the University of Northern Colorado and Laura from Colorado State University. Both these ladies have demonstrated a heart that wants to follow God and help others do so. We spend a lot of time together in Team Leader training, Bible Study, One on Ones, and hiking/fun times of course! Please pray for Hannah and Laura to know God even more deeply this summer and for their futures as they both just graduated! Yay!

As for me, I'm so blessed by the mountains, the Staff team, the students, and all the adventures we've had so far. I am still waiting and praying to see a bull moose and touch a beaver's tail. Here's hoping :)

Just a Couch?

2009-05-20T22:46:00.003-06:00

Just a couch? Or do you see something more? About a month ago, I threw out an idea to set up an old couch and offer prayer to students passing by in the Student Center to the Prayer Team. At first eyes darted away from mine and they shifted uneasily in their seats. Finally one student said, "Let's do it."

Our goal with "Free Prayer" day was simple: to encourage students at UCCS as well as get them thinking about eternal things. What better way than offering prayer to people right before finals, graduation, and summer transitions.

We set up shop on a Wednesday, dragging a slightly used couch to the center of the Upper Plaza. (Ok, so the couch had definitely been sitting in a garage and been sat on by many a dog, but after intense vacuuming and some lint rollers, we were good to go.) Taking hour long shifts, we each sat on the couch and invited people to come over and share requests.

Here are some highlights:
1. Nav students who volunteered were strengthened in their faith as they stepped out and engaged in prayer with fellow peers.
2. Two of the girls in my Investigative Bible Study came specifically to pray with me about difficulties in their lives.
3. We prayed with the new student body president who has had some misunderstandings about Christianity.
4. People were vulnerable with hurt in their lives.
5. We all got our first taste of the summer sun (ie we all looked like lobsters at the end of the day).

Lots of prayer, lots of interested looks, and even a guy who said we should flip a coin to see if we should pray for him; all in all a fantastic day on campus.

Next time you see an old couch, think beyond it's character, where it's been, and how to get it to Good Will; look beyond what it is. . .even an old green couch can bring God glory.

Jamie (my teammate) and I ready for some prayer at the UCCS Upper Plaza.

The Invitation

2009-04-29T15:16:00.004-06:00

"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters;

Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat was is good and your soul will delight in the richest of fare."

Isaiah 55:1a-2

The ever present invitation to come be with Jesus; the invitation for the thirsty to drink, for the hungry to eat, for the laborer to find satisfaction.

The invitation had been sent over and over to Christina. She usually stamped it, unopened, with a "return to sender" label and put it right back in the mail. Sometimes she'd open the invitation and glance at the letters, and set it aside, eventually thinking that party had long since happened.

But God kept sending her invitations to come to Him, and last week she responded.

I got a text from Christina on Monday: "Hey, got anytime this week that you would want to do a quiet time with me or just get together?" A quiet time?! Quite surprised Christina initiated with me the desire to read the Bible, I texted her back a time and place, curious to hear about what was going on in that heart of hers.

Sitting across from her at Starbucks yesterday, she began to pour out her story between sips of hot chocolate, about how she discovered God in a real way last week.

"Lauren, no one notices when I'm missing; missing from Navs, missing from rugby, missing from class. . .all these things that I thought would fill my life are disappointing me. And then I realized, Navigators won't satisfy me, rugby won't satisfy me, class won't satisfy me. I need God, and I never thought I'd say that."

Ha! Neither did I! I've been praying for Christina, meeting with her, trying to make the Bible as exciting and clear as possible (without having to pull out felt-board Jesus or break out the tap shoes), and nothing has seemed to click. But all this time, God has been faithfully sending Christina invitations to come to Him, and she is finally responding.

I sat across from Christina and sent silent praises to God, as I listened to this 21 year old spout off these new epiphanies. We read Isaiah 55 together and she wrote in her journal.

She finished her hot chocolate and made a comment about having too much caffeine, and then we planned out what to read this week. And I am still amazed. God is so kind to constantly be sending out invitations to come to Him. To have relationship with him and discover what truly satisfies.

Me and Christina at the Valentine's Dinner this past February.

Ski Art

2009-04-18T15:47:00.007-06:00

Every winter season I have high hopes of making it to the slopes an excessive amount of times. Living two and a half hours away from the nearest lift and working with college students seems to hinder olympic ski aspirations, so I've decided to go into the lesser known, but potentially lucrative business of "Ski Art."

What is it you ask?! How you can you be a part of the Ski Art experience?!

Well, first you need some end of season spring conditions. I'm talking slushy 7 eleven slurpy type snow. Then you need some great friends that will do weird things. Be sure to leave all expectations of an awesome ski day at the car, grab your camera, and start snapping away. There you have it, Ski Art. For the common folk who still wear bibs and scarves skiing. . .or who just can't make it to the slopes enough to brave the terrain park.
Cheers to spring conditions!!

Road Trip: Part Three, Making a Splash

2009-04-01T15:35:00.002-06:00

You can't take a group of 19 and 20 year olds to Southern California and not have a little fun! So while our friends back in Colorado were braving the blizzards, we played in the surf and sun, and sang along with Jack Sparrow on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney.

I really enjoyed the last day in California. My teammate Jamie and I took two van fulls of landlocked students to Laguna Beach to boogie board, play in the sand, and explore the tide pools. As I sat on the beach and watch them conquer the waves I smiled and really felt the joy of their pleasure. I can only guess this is what a parent feels like when they see their kids truly enjoying something, and how God must feel when we're doing the very things he's created us for on earth.

The students would occasionally run up from the icy Pacific waters with different types of seaweed wearing them as wigs, or scarves; it was quite entertaining. We also touched sea anemones and urchins, watched a few crabs fight over a meal, and found a very large and slimy sea slug making his daily rounds in his tide pool.

I really believe discipleship reaches it's most glorious points when you spend a lot of time together. Spending eight days with 17 students really allowed everyone to see the gamut of emotions and personalities under every kind of circumstance: stress, anxiety, fun, relaxation, quick decisions, etc. Each day held challenges and I really wanted to be a model, always responding in that angelic godly way. Haha. I laugh now. But despite the ups and downs I believe I got to exercise that humility muscle, you know that one small piece of our bodies that occasionally overpowers our opinions, sarcasm, irritation, and so on. And in God's grace, we all learned, we all loved, and we all are back safe and sound.

What an adventure!

Laguna Beach Time!

One of the seaweed wigs! (And some boogie boarders.)

Road Trip: Part Two, Service with a Smile

2009-03-26T10:25:00.004-06:00

On Sunday we took the troops to a Cambodian American church in Long Beach to help clean their facility by window washing, gardening, cleaning, and all the other various things 20 year olds can be entrusted to do without leaving permanent damage to the property.

I really treasured our time here because not only did the students get to give their time and energy to helping out fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, but they were exposed to the nations, right here in America. When we arrived we were able to listen to a few stories of the difficult and tragic journey Cambodians have been traveling for the past thirty years. Lukina, a church member, said that most Cambodians have been exposed to at least 13 tragedies in their lifetime including death, starvation, rape, murder, prison, labor camps, and more. Many Cambodians escaped to the United States to begin new lives, but only if they were fortunate enough to get a sponsor to pay for their way over. And Cambodians are so hungry for good news, and respond quickly to the Gospel message.

Here were are, post work, in front of the Cambodian American church!

The next morning we were out the door before the sun woke up and headed to downtown Los Angeles to help Project Angel Food in the kitchen. Project Angel Food cooks meals and serves 1500 clients in the LA area who cannot afford proper nutrition and have medical problems.

After dressing up in the fashionable kitchen attire including, hair net, apron, and gloves (unfortunately no booties), we jumped right in making gravy, packaging meals, and slicing up anything they put in front of us.

After we sliced and diced and packaged and at some snacks, we went out and delivered the very meals we made! Our students were able to meet face to face people who relied on the love of others.
Here I am slicing up a honeydew. Gotta love the hair net!

We're about to go out into the community with our food!!

Road Trip: Part One, Escape to LA

2009-03-20T16:09:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow at 4:30am I will be playing the ultimate game of tetris, as I try to fit and eventually cram everyone's luggage into three rental vans. My teammates, Jamie and Derrik, and myself will be driving 17 UCCS students to sunny California for their spring break. I hope I survive.

This year's trip is really unique. Our theme is "Super-Cali-Fellowship," with an emphasis on the fellowship. 1 John 1:7 says, "If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus purifies us from all sin." Over the next seven days we will learn what real fellowship is through devotionals, service projects, and playing on the beach.

This entire trip has been bathed in prayer and the students are thinking about more than coming back with a tan. I really believe they are excited to take Jesus into Los Angeles and take steps forward in their personal fellowship with God and with others. I can only imagine our love for each other will be tested by the first brave soul who nervously asks, "Can we stop? I have to go to the bathroom." I hope we don't have an casualties due to small bladders. What a sad way to go.

I found this website designated to praying for L.A. I printed out some of their prayer points to give to students, because, well, shoot, I bet people in L.A. have a better idea of what to pray for! I'd love for you to join me in praying some of these things in addition to things like safety driving, unity, and well, sanity.

Pray for L.A.

1. A revival in Los Angeles

Pockets of people seek God as best they can, yet the majority of the city sleeps. We need to wake up! We need to be revived! We need to have the sleep rubbed from our eyes.

2. Pray for "prodigals" to return home

Prodigal people are recklessly extravagant. They leave wisdom behind and expend all their resources wastefully. Many in Los Angeles have become a prodigal generation. Many have left God to pursue the things of this world.

3. Conquering spiritual strongholds

A stronghold is a place of security. There are strongholds for both Christ and Satan. In Los Angeles, many strongholds are obvious and many are hidden. Therein lies much danger. Since Los Angeles impacts the world, the strongholds here are indeed strong and massive.

(These were taken from http://www.prayforla.org/ visit me for more info!)

I'm excited to spend time with the students, especially some of the girls in the ministry that I really want to invest in, but, alas, I lack the time. I'm sure a 20hour road trip will do wonders for our relationships.

Cactus garden at The Getty Center overing looking a smoggy day in Los Angeles.

No Tripping Allowed

2009-03-18T17:37:00.005-06:00

"Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses. . ." I enthusiastically waved my hands around in exaggerated motions to symbolize a great cloud. That summer of 2004 I remember flapping my arms and making funny motions to help kids learn the camp memory verses, Hebrews 12:1-2. It continues, "let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance, the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus. . ."

I've always loved those verses. I can so clearly picture a runner, shoes rhythmically hitting the pavement, one after another, expending every last ounce of energy to get to the finish line. This past weekend, I was the runner, in real life, completing my first 5k; insignificant to the elite runner's world, but an accomplishment for me, the lay jogger.

My friend, Meredith, who serves with The Navigators at The University of Colorado (CU-Boulder), came down to run with me. She's experienced, fast, and full of energy. She was my cloud of witnesses on Saturday, keeping me on pace and heading toward the goal. We prepped our race with some "running" passages and Hebrews 12:1-2 came up, reminding me that when I run, I have to persevere. And believe me, that moment came, when Meredith looked at me and said, "less than a mile!" And I turned to her and through my pants said, "Yay!" even though I secretly wanted to trip myself and lie in the street to catch my breath.

But I finished (without tripping myself) and we drank our water and ate the celebratory bagels and oranges as we walked around the park waiting for the St. Patrick's Day parade to start.

What a great physical reminder to run the race of life with perseverance. The Spring semester at UCCS is in full swing with a host of activities, one on ones, and lots of Bible study. I'm exhausted at times, but those moments are when I need to fix my eyes on the goal, Jesus, and look at my cloud of witnesses to cheer me on.

Meredith and I after persevering the 5k on St. Patrick's Day in Colorado Springs.

More than Familiar

2009-01-27T16:58:00.003-07:00

Teen temperatures sent me power walking through the UCCS library today on my way to meet with a student. It's always my ambition to find ways to avoid being outside on such days. As I pumped my arms and clomped my boots passed studious collegiates and book lined shelves, I found myself recognizing faces. "Hi, Lauren!" a student said as I passed by. "Oh, hey! How are you?" A brief exchange of salutations and I was off again. Then it hit me. I'm not a student here, yet I know so many people.

There up on the bluff, within the public university, are dozens of faces that are more than familiar to me. They have names, they have personalities, they have pasts, they have futures, they have questions, they have thoughts, they exist to me. And every time I step foot on campus I enter into their world of activity. I am living life with them all the while showing them the light of Jesus.

I sat in Jazzman's, the on campus coffee shop, and talked with my freshman friend and we both occasionally paused to say hi to our passing friends. I think it's a testimony of God's grace and favor to give me friendships with these college students.

Thanks for your prayers-they are the foundations of these relationships.

The UCCS library. . .my inside "shortcut" during snowy days. (Please imagine a white ground and me huffing and puffing with seven layers on in this picture.)

And We're Off!

2009-01-19T11:54:00.003-07:00

The 2009 UCCS Spring semester begins tomorrow! Soon the parking lots will be filled with cars, the smell of Jazzman's coffee will again float through the University Center, study rooms in the library occupied by all those single individuals will be commandeered by members of the Prayer Team. It will be grand.

With all this buzz of activity means I need to figure out my semester schedule and start making plans. Even thinking of that task makes me break out into some form of hives. Yes, I have allergic reactions even to the thought of making a schedule. It's quite difficult to sit down and set in stone your course of action when one works with college students who's schedules are akin to a newborn's (you know, frequent naps, frequent feedings, awake during the wee hours of the night, play dates, drooling. . .ok, maybe not drooling).

Prayers are appreciated as I contact the women I mentor and set up our one on ones, and plan the material for the Investigative Bible Discussion, and plan all the little interactions with students throughout my week. Whew!

Come back soon to see how I made it through my first week back! Perhaps there will be evidence of these schedule induced hives!! :)

This is what my head feels like when I think about making a schedule. (This is actually from an Eagle Lake Extended Version day last January where we let children play with stacks of newspaper. . .another form of recycling, and a great way to make your eye twitch.)

Scoping out Hollywood

2009-01-15T18:21:00.004-07:00

There are so many adventures when you're on staff with collegiate Navs! Just last week my teammates, Jamie and Derrik, and I flew out to Los Angeles to scope out the city that we will soon be bringing some of our UCCS students to for their Spring Break.

Some Highlights:

1. randomly sitting in front of one of my former UCCS Bible Study girls on the plane to L.A.!

2. touching the Pacific Ocean for the first time!

3. seeing Amy (now 15!!) whom I used to nanny several years ago.

4. discovering heaven on earth: Yogurtland!

5. talking to Project Angel Food about volunteering our time to help prepare meals

Some "I'm so glad we figured this out before we brought students out here" moments:

1. all the interstates that run together like spaghetti ("the 5" "the 405" "the 55" weird)

2. having a GPS is not helpful, is necessary for survival and sanity!

3. expect to pay $$ for parking anywhere you go

4. there are way more fun things to do in L.A. than visit the Hollywood Wax Museum

5. Santa Monica is the home of the "original" Muscle Beach

Our theme for this trip is "Super Cali-Fellowship" and we'll be taking a closer look at what real fellowship means. 1 John 1:7 says that "if we walk in the light as he is in the light we have fellowship with one another. . ." Our desire is for students to not only enjoy each other and the sights and sounds of L.A., but to really know that true fellowship is only experienced by walking in the light of Christ.

Spring Break isn't until the end of March, but it'll be here sooner than I expect! Please pray for 18 students to commit to this trip and for their hearts to long for true fellowship. And please pray for our planning!!

Jamie and I at Long Beach-look at those beautiful palms!

Amy and I at Yogurtland-the most delicious place your tatsebuds will ever know!

Giving your Life Away

2008-12-22T09:18:00.002-07:00

It is Christ's love that compels me, for I am convinced that he died for all, that everyone who lives, should no longer live for themselves but for Christ, who died and gave himself up for everyone. Jesus Christ died for me, that I might be free from the bondage of sin here on earth, and free from eternal separation from God. This grand and unrepeatable act of love is what drives me to give my life away everyday.

EDGE Corps is the current avenue of which I am giving my life to others. To help college students grow in their faith and for me to learn to walk more closely with God has been one of the greatest privileges in my life thus far.

December 14-16 college students and young adults from all over the country gathered at the Glen Eyrie Conference Center for EDGE Preview to hear more about how they can give their lives away while in college, after graduation, and in their careers. At any given moment you'd see students with paper and pen, eyes squinted, searching for God in the pages of his Word.

The Lord also affirmed me in the significance of spending your life on behalf of the Gospel, through encouraging statements of women I have influenced in these past two years. Kari Weiss, a West Texas A&M student who I mentored at a 2007 Summer Training Program in Missouri, stood up and shared how I helped her learn the benefits of daily time with God, and never gave up on her even though she struggled with consistency and early mornings. Coele Stone, a student in my ministry at UCCS shared that I helped her learn how to share her faith and read the Bible with a co-worker. God even let me be used at the conference with Emily Jones of the University of Dayton, by spending some time with her praying over difficulties back home.

Sometimes I don't want to give my life away. Sometimes I want to keep it all to myself and do the things I have my heart set on (like attempting to bake the perfect biscotti, or searching for the perfect winter shoes, or even just laying around). While these things aren't inherently wrong, they can stem from selfishness, a stubborn heart, or even lack of discipline. I can't replace loving others and helping them on behalf of myself all the time. Jesus says those who want to save their lives will lose them.

Remembering what Jesus did for me produces motivation to go and do the same for him. Right now that looks like EDGE Corps, and for many of the students who came to EDGE Preview, the next two years will look similar to them. But for those in the full time work force, student-dom, or professional diaper changing, you too can give your life away right where you're at. Think of Christ and what his love for you accomplished on the cross. Then say, "Jesus, my life is yours, how should I live today?"

He will probably want you to spend time with him, and he will probably give you opportunities to love, serve, give, and share truth with others. Will we take hold of these things? Or will we keep living for ourselves?

Christ's love compels me. . .may it compel you too.

Jamie, Leigh Ann, myself, and Meredith all are serving with EDGE Corps currently. We are grateful for the opportunities to pour ourselves out to colleges students, that they may know Jesus.

What's a Christmas Gram? I want one!

2008-12-07T11:28:00.003-07:00

Last Thursday UCCS Navigators had our annual Ministry Team Christmas party complete with a white elephant gift exchange and those a ton of those little smokies.

What a blast to celebrate the reason we live with 19 wonderful students who have chosen to follow Christ and help others do the same.

Jamie, Derrik (my EDGE teammates) and I did our best entertained the troops with a few improv skits. During the white elephant gift exchange, I inherited a 1970's rendition of Jesus and the little children decoupaged on a tree stump. Surprisingly no one wanted this gift after I opened it. Luckily I was able to regift it before the night was over saving me a trip to the Arc. whew.

We finished the night with some Christmas carols and prayer.

I am so thankful for this opportunity with The Navigators!

Me, Coele, and Ashlea really enjoyed the singing part of the night. . .a little too much.

An action shot from some improve (me, Derrik, Jamie).

Shawn gets an awesome owl figurine for his gift!

Kathy cannot seem to open her gift, as it was wrapped about a dozen times.

Ashlea proudly displays her new suit of armor hat.

Pray for the Nations

2008-12-04T10:57:00.002-07:00

Today is pray for the world's people who are in darkness day. . .(Day 19 in 31 days of Prayer by Ruth Meyers).

It was so enjoyable and so inspiring, I thought I'd share some of it, that you too, may join me in praying for those who are still prisoners in darkness.

"Thank you that my prayers can help fulfill Your longings to include in Your family people from every tribe and language and people and nation. What a family to belong to! And what an honor to help in this tremendous task through prayer!

Yet how terrible is the destiny of those who ignore Your salvation! Stir in my heart, Lord-and the hearts of countless others-to pray more for those who have heard of You but have not yet responded. And for the millions who are still without the gospel.

Lord, You are the Master of breakthroughs. Bring mighty breakthroughs of the gospel throughout the world. Penetrate Satan's lines of defense. Do this especially among Muslims, among Buddhists, among Hindus, among Jews, as well as among atheists-these great strongholds that the gospel has barely dented. Break through, Lord, to their leaders and to their people. May the reality of Christ and His saving love dawn in their hearts like a brilliant sunrise. And may Your Spirit work with usual power through those who are ministering among them.

You have promised that the ends of the earth will be Your Son's possession. I ask You to accomplish this soon."

Campfire Thoughts: Trusting God

2008-11-24T16:32:00.009-07:00

The temperature quickly drops out here in Colorado as soon as that sun sinks below the mountains. With the chillier weather comes the much anticipated campfires. A few weeks ago a ton of UCCS Navigator students piled into cars after Navs and headed to Glen Eyrie for some s'mores and to absorb that delightful hot dog campfire smell into their clothing.

Prior to catching marshmallows on fire, we heard from Glenn and Margo Balsis on the topic of trusting God-a topic that will always intrigue me, always challenge me, and always give me hope. They listed three things that derail our trust in God and three things that deepen our trust in God. I thought I'd share them, as they were a delight to me.

How to quickly derail your trust in God:

1. Doubting that God cares about you

Take the disciples caught in the storm while Jesus slept-they woke him up saying, "Don't you care?!!" Of course God cares, but when we doubt that he does, we stop trusting him.

2. Insisting on having clarity

Think about Abraham who went to a land he did not know. If we waited for every detail to surface before we moved ahead, we'd be in the same place forever.

3. Indulging in wishful thinking

When God calls us to a certain task, we need to march forward with boldness and not squander away time and emotions on what could be.

How to solidly deepen your trust in God:

1. Remembering God and the way he's helped you

Remembering how God's helped you will refocus your attention on his character and ability.

2. Commit concerns one by one to God

Voice every concern to God because he cares and wants to help. It also helps us let go and let God work.

3. Depend on the gages of God's Word

Just like a pilot depends on his gages because his eyes cannot always understand, so we need to fix our eyes on God's word, which help us gage situations and circumstances when we don't understand.

This topic stirred up a lot of great conversations at the campfire. Some of the girls in Navs shared with me what makes it difficult for them to fully trust God. What a precious moment to get a glimpse inside their personal walks with the Lord.

Trusting God is a daily decision. What an honor to be a part of helping and watching young women make the choice to trust God!

How we feel when we don't trust God

How we feel when we do trust God

Larry, the (not so scary) Leviathan

2008-11-20T16:32:00.005-07:00

In a recent bunny trail of cross references I landed in the last few chapters of Job. Hesitant to read it because I myself might suffer tumultuous times (you undergo the same superstitions, I sure, in fact I still avoid revelation thinking the end time will come as soon as I read it. . .hmmm), I skimmed the material with eyes half closed. There, written in well crafted descriptions, an incomparably fierce beast lives.

I will be the first to admit my unhealthy fear of the long dead dinosaur. One look at the cover of the Jurassic Park DVD will make me believe raptors are living in my basement, thus another room rendered obsolete due to dinosaur habitation. So reading a story about a "leviathan" whose description sounds about as close to a sea dwelling dinosaur as I've ever heard, made my palms a little sweaty.

This mighty beast cannot be caught, it will not beg for mercy, and it certainly cannot be put on a leash as a pet. "If you lay a hand on him, you will remember the struggle and never do it again!" (Job 41:8) Any hope of subduing him is false, and even the sight of this creature is overpowering. In the midst of describing the leviathan God says, " No one is fierce enough to rouse him. Who then is able to stand against me? Who has any claim against me that I must pay? Everything under heaven belongs to me." Job 41:10-11

After picturing the matchless strength of this created being, God notes that he is more powerful. If there is not a contender for the leviathan, than certainly there is no contender before God. I was humbled as I meditated on God's power and strength. How foolish I am to try and contain God or manipulate him, as if I actually could. Pride and arrogance have run ahead of me blazing my path, going my own way, believing I know what's best, good, and right. I've lived moments of attributing any success to my own abilities and spoken opinion as if they were God's. Now I realize that when I've done these things I am standing against God.

In the final chapter, after God reminded Job of his incomparable power, Job replies, "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted." Job 42:2 I cling to the might of God. How good it is to remember that no on can stand against him; no one can thwart his plans; no one can match his abilities.

One difficult thing about being in full time ministry is to try and not formulate the "perfect plan" for each student. This means a delicate balance of praying for wisdom to guide them, and pushing them to consider opportunities that will encourage their growth. I know many times I have wanted a student to make a decision about their summer or semester so bad that I almost make it seem that it's the only way to know God better. It's in these times of control that I stand against God thinking I have the best plan for the student, rather than letting God work in their hearts while using my efforts as a mentor in their lives.

It is so good to know that God's power is at work in the lives of my students and my personal life. Living in the reality of who we are in comparison with God instantly humbles the prideful, with the reminder that he calls the shots. Growing in the knowledge of his power will also put perspective to any situation or circumstance placing peace in our hearts. I am so thankful for a God who's power surpasses even the sharpest teeth and fiercest prehistoric attitudes.

My less than intimidating rendition of the leviathan. . .he looks sorta furry and kind.

Transfer of Kingdoms

2008-11-05T10:11:00.003-07:00

Think back with me to Spring Semester 08 at UCCS. The cold claws of winter tearing at my pink puffy vest, snow on the ground crunchy from the few warm rays that broke through the frigid atmosphere, and me and a UCCS student with a small white sheet of paper. Scribbled on it, a name and dorm room number, and an open door to come talk about the Gospel.

Knocking on that dorm room door that night connected me with an intelligent and fiery sophomore named Christina. Full of facts and figures and equipped with a scientific brain that defies my overly gooey feelings and emotions, we embarked on a friendship based on a mutual love for Panera Bread.

Each time we approached the topic of religious items, doubt extinguished any truth that approached the vicinity of her heart. It was like a wet blanket draped over her heart, weighing it down and preventing access to it.

After nearly eight months of praying for Christina and trying to explain God in scientific matters (which for me is like a four year old trying to explain how a microwave works, actually as a 25 year old, that still remains a great mystery to me), she asked to go to The Navigator collegiate fall conference called, Journey. Thrilled, I spilled the logistics over the phone and got her signed up for some stellar workshops.

This weekend, Christina went to Journey and the wet blanket of her heart began to dry up and dissolve. She said she felt numb and longed to experience what the other 500 students were experiencing when they talked about their relationship with God and worshipped him in song. On the Sunday morning, hours before the end of the conference, Christina and I read God's word. I challenged her to believe with her heart and not just rationalize with her brain.

That morning the speaker, Johnny Square, gave a powerful message and an invitation to receive God's love. In that auditorium, the Holy Spirit was working, people were praying, God was drawing Christina to himself and there, she walked down the stairs and through faith said, I want Jesus Christ in my life.

"For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." Colossians 1:13-14

Christina, once captive to the darkness, now stands in the kingdom of the Son of God, redeemed and fully forgiven.

Please pray for Christina as she grows in the knowledge and love of God, and as she reads and memorizes the Word of God.

Journey 08

2008-10-31T09:28:00.002-06:00

Today marks day one of Journey. Tonight over 500 college students in the Rocky Mountain Region will gather in Estes Park, Colorado for the annual Journey Fall Conference. The theme is Love God and Love People, and I'm praying for everyone to really encounter Jesus this weekend.

We have over 50 students from UCCS!

I have the privilege of emceeing the meetings with my friend, Clint this weekend. We are planning a little Spartan Cheer for the kickoff tonight and will be giving away some great prizes.

Please pray for our speaker, Johnny Square, and all the workshop leaders as they present truth from the Word to these students. Also pray that lives would be changed and God would be praised.

Be sure to check back to see what God did at Journey!!

Spahhhh Day

2008-10-24T12:53:00.003-06:00

It only happens twice a year. . .you know, painting the toes. The first time celebrates the end of my beloved summer infusing a last bit of vibrant coral color into the more earthy tones of fall, and the second at the annual Navigators Women's Spa Day.

Spa day inserts an afternoon of tranquility into a hectic midterm schedule for the UCCS ladies. Stations are set up to encourage maximum relaxation and enjoyment including facials, nails, and even a quiet time room. I personally frequented the edibles station snagging cucumber sandwiches and chocolate chip cookies.

Rounding the corner into the evening we enjoyed a meal together cooked by two fantastic mom's of our students. I then had the privilege of speaking to the ladies about how to abandon the worries and anxieties of life, because, unfortunately there would not be a women's spa day every weekend to escape to. But I did get to tell them about God, and a few of his mighty attributes that can melt away any fear or stressor.

Out of Lamentations 3 Jeremiah shares how well he remembers all his troubles. With the pain and hardships fresh in his mind he says,

"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,

for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning,

great is your faithfulness."

(Lamentations 3:21-23)

So many hard things YET he chose to call to mind the great and loyal love of the Lord, his unfailing compassion, and his strong faithfulness. Jeremiah put his hope in the Lord to act and carry him through troubling circumstances.

My prayer is that the women of UCCS Navigators would look to the Lord in times these times of worry and anxiety and put their hope in him. So many are chosing to do this already and it is a great source of joy (both for me and them).

My Village People

2008-09-26T14:17:00.003-06:00

After Navnights end the after parties begin every Wednesday night at UCCS. It's been a point of joy for me to connect relationally with so many students during these late night shindigs.

This past Wednesday night we piled into cars and made our pilgrimage to the iconic late night diner wooing us into the parking lot with the soft glow of its neon orange piping. Figures of cookies and cream milkshakes frosting over their cute glassy containers had been floating through my head all day. I'm pretty sure I mentioned I was getting one of these to every person I crossed paths with that day (strangers not exempt from this information).

Food and people, what better two combinations? Our small army of collegiates commandeered half the restaurant and began the orders of pies and fries and pancakes and did I mention milkshakes?? I sat at the end of a long stretch of tables with three freshmen that fill my heart with joy. As the night progressed it only solidified my love for them as we laughed over knitting and accents and other less substantial subject matters.

After dropping my new UCCS friends back off at the dorms I praised God for the opportunity to be a part of their lives; to be a part of their journey of finding and holding tight to Truth. Before I knew them, I was praying for these three students, and here they are, gifts from God.

Starting with milkshakes, moving into trust, and growing into people who love Jesus.

Where Your Pancakes are, There Your Heart will be also

2008-09-23T15:03:00.004-06:00

Grabbing my wallet and keys I dash out the front door pushing through the river of delicious pancake smell that had wafted its way from the kitchen to the entry way. I leave behind a table of friends and cinnamon goodness being baked to perfection in quaint little circles easily devoured in three or four bites. Outwardly, a potentially wonderful morning, inwardly my heart mutters under its beats the familiar song of "mine" in g-minor.

Out of milk, a pancake breakfast staple, and watching my roommate dip the measuring cup into my personal stash of delicious oat bran pancake mix, churned within me the desire to dash through the kitchen with a sharpie and mark fat letters branding everything of mine. Driving down to the grocery store, I was appalled to think how irritated I was over sharing kitchen commodities with people so dear to me. It wasn't just the milk or pancakes that sent this mine alarm ringing, but a deep seeded sense of ownership that was reaching even the smallest of items in a pantry of possessions.

Reading though A.W. Tozer's book, The Pursuit of God, Tozer states so eloquently, "There is within the human heart a tough, fibrous root of fallen life whose nature is to possess, always to possess. It covets things with a deep and fierce passion. The pronouns my and mine look innocent enough in print, but their constant and universal use is significant. . .They are verbal symptoms of our deep disease." That morning witnessing my pancake mix being depleted and seeing my milk jug empty tugged on that tough fibrous root grown so deep within the walls of my heart and I realized how infected I was with the disease of possession.

Matthew 5:3 drives home why it is so utterly good to be void of all sense of possessing: "Blessed is the poor in spirit for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven." A verse breezed by in past readings now popped off the page with a font so big and bold there was no ignoring it. I feel as though if I had tried to turn the page the letters would have ripped through the other side. To be poor in spirit means to be detached from all sense of possessing. All things in our lives are surrendered to God, devoid of their power to grab our focus and our allegiance. To be poor in spirit uproots everything that we have so confidently and stringently labeled our own, including relationships, money, and material items, even pancake mixes, no matter how wonderfully tasty.

As we become poor inwardly, we are released from the slavery of things. Your emotions and decisons and thoughts are no longer controlled by your bank account or affirmation from certain individuals, or by your shoes or other beloved collections. When we possess, we are under the authority of those things. Our focus is shifted and on the throne of our hearts, where God should rightfully sit, is a shiny red ipod.

The very act of uprooting our possessions will be painful. The roots have grown tightly around our source of conscience and pulling on them will only create scratches and tears as they are extracted. But will we feel a sense of loss? Will surrendering all we have, giving it all over to God, will that hollow us out and leave us wanting? According to Matthew 5:3 the poor in spirit possess the kingdom of heaven. To possess nothing is to have access to everything. Just like the father in the parable of the Prodigal Son said to his son who complained about the lack of gifts, "Son, everything I have is yours."

Symbol of Shalom

2008-08-19T18:29:00.004-06:00

Half way through the Sea Tribe trip, we took five days and served at Base Camp, building railings on the jetty. We also celebrated America's birthday and clocked in a lot of hours with South China Sea.

Though surrounded with American friends in a tropical land with a soothing vista, I experienced a week of inner frustrations. Engaging with God's Word proved difficult, an eye twitch began to develop at the sight of some people, and something seriously painful was attacking my stomach.

Perhaps it was a small taste of culture shock, or maybe spiritual warfare, but I knew an obvious low point was about to be cleared for landing. Everything seemed to frustrate me, no matter how small or insignificant. I felt anxious about relationships, about my role on the trip, about what the next islands would hold. Sinking in a pool of my own distress, I turned to God.

Over the course of the trip I had been praying to experience a characteristic of God in a deeper way. During some time alone on the beach I read 2 Thessalonians 3:16 which says, "Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you." I looked up and there the ocean waves calmly rolled up onto the shore. Steady, constant, and soothing. In all my trips to the beach, the ocean has always been a symbol of God's peace for me. In that moment I chose to give thanks to God for his peace that is available to me at all times and in every way. Reflecting over the past few weeks I realized where God coated me with his peace; language school, asking spiritual questions, being far away from home, and so on.

God didn't stop there. Images of the polluted waters surrounding the native islands flashed in my mind. Trash coated the ocean and it was hardly recognizable. At base camp the ocean was so pure, easily identifiable and enjoyable. Just like the ocean at Base Camp, this is the way God's peace is intended to be. But at neighboring islands the ocean was masked with trash, a picture of human depravity covering the peace of God. It's like my sin, my frustrations, my anxieties littering the sea, preventing me from experiencing the depth and richness of God's peace.

I still wrestled with frustrations through the rest of the week, but now the focal point did not land on the hardship. Rather I went to God presenting him with the annoying person or the stomach pain or relational messiness and asked for his peace. In doing so, I chose not to mask the peace of God with my garbage. Instead I experienced full peace, which he graciously gives at all times and in every way even when the circumstances were less than peaceful.

Ocean at base camp: God's symbol of shalom

American Independence celebration on July 4th complete with a bonfire and skits to entertain each other at base camp. The girls perform "This is Common Problems: Mistakes Americans make in Indonesia."

No, Clint is not trying to saw me in half, rather we are working hard while we accidentally knock nails into the ocean. . .oops.

Starry Night of Joy

2008-07-23T14:25:00.010-06:00

Pulau Dua: My starry night of Joy

You know those things in life that are good for you? The things that you should like and sometimes do out of conflicting personal obligation; things like drinking 64oz of water, or flossing, or like the things that should make it on your grocery list but are often substituted by much tastier options, like cool ranch doritos?

Welcome to my inward struggle. Hashed out right here on the second island. To be honest, my heart was far away from the Sea Tribe peoples. I struggled to love them like God loves them. I struggled to embrace them and understand their thoughts and values. I couldn't mask the reality of my stale heart. I could not break my heart for these people. I could not fake compassion, care, or concern. So I asked God, I pleaded with God, to break my heart for the Sea Tribe peoples.

This is the story of Island Two.

Rambutan, the hairy fruit. Lots and lots of rambutan. And coconut milk, with floating bits of coconut flesh swimming around in the mix matched glasses. It was kind of like drinking sweet water with an occasional slug. The island leader passes around a megaphone urging all the american friends to say their names and where their from. Enter one of my favorite moments in time: My friend Clint rather than saying, "my name is" introduces himself as, "I am from Clint." Even better, he thinks the explosion of native laughter is because his name is like, as many teased him before, "Bill Clinton." Alas, dear Clint, we were laughing at your bahasa.

We meet our host family. A lovely Ibu, local teacher of the Koran, a mother of two, and a heart set on having a baby girl. A thoughtful Bapak, shrimper, our island tour guide, and deemed body guard. Two crazy boys, who really love rambutan. . .and mischief (ie bringing me a collection of bugs, including one very hairy, and scary spider).

The transformation begins. There is a sense of great delight and joy as we share company with each other. We stay up late and have, what the 16 year old girl inside me calls, pillow talk. We share stories about life and ideas about God. Bapak paces the house at night to make sure we are comfortable and safe and rescues our bags from a leaky room during the Monsoon of Torrential Terror one night. He takes us on a tour of the island and shows us the bat cave. Ibu makes snacks and eagerly waits for us to wake up from our afternoon naps. She just enjoys being with us. The boys sing songs with us and tag along during our island excursions. With each encounter, God moves in my heart. I begin to see this family through the eyes of Jesus. The staleness of my two dimensional view of these people began to crack. Through shared experiences and conversations, God lifted this family off the page of some culture tour book and gave them beating hearts, real spirits, personalities, joys, sorrows, memories.

The last night Ibu wanted to take us to the shore line to look at the stars and city lights from a neighboring island. The simplicity of her invitation and desire just to spend time with us melted my heart. Together, we praised God for creating the stars, sang a few songs, and sat in a warm, satisfying silence.

The next day when we left, I thought about the moment Jesus looked a Peter and, "loved him." I looked at Ibu and I loved her. Tears fell from our eyes and we hugged.

The South China Sea became a little less salty and a little more sweet the day I left Pulau Dua. God is able to change hearts, all kinds, and all conditions.

On our hike to the bat cave we were afforded this incredible view of the island. Island two's houses rested inside the jungle, rather than over the water.

The island's Mosque.

This is me eating, what I like to call, "the fruit of death," but the official name is Durian. There were only two close calls of regurgitation on this trip. You are witnessing one of them.

Swimming is enjoyable all hours of the day.

Bapak climbed the coconut tree to bring me this fun treat. (Bapak is actually in the background, most likely about to hack into more coconuts with his mighty machete.)

Greeted by the drum chorus moments before the birth of "Clint-ville."

Rambutan: the hairy fruit.

Feeling hot, hot, hot

2008-07-21T11:57:00.009-06:00

Pulau Satu: the hottest day of my life

The boat cuts across the sea to our first island. A drum chorus echos from the end of the jetty. We dock and are ushered to the government office by a mob of laughing children. Everyone is talking and shouting. Children press their faces against the window to catch a peak at the foreigners as we sit and await our host families. Sweat rolls down our backs and our legs stick to the plastic chairs.

We take a brief walk and culture shock sets in. I am far away from home. Weak structures supported by even weaker pilings resemble houses and the ocean is littered with garbage. A goat chews on grass inside the gates of the mosque. Chickens run under my feet as I try and maintain pace with my group. The odor of baked trash and fishy discards are carried by the faint breeze. This is not my life, I whisper to myself, I was bought at a price.

Our host family consists of a mother (Ibu) and her daughter (Kakak) and Kakak's three children. I think their decision to host us was based on the celebrity status of housing americans under their roof. Every meal was akin to thanksgiving and we all stuffed ourselves out of polite obligation (I can't say I would have eaten three helpings of full bodied fish and spicy beans back home). Conversations skimmed the surface and with their desireless nature toward thought, our team spent time most of our time visiting other families.

On our second full day we spent time with Ibu Zimah, a woman of character and an incredible cook! The combination of her homemade tapestries and a red tile floor along with her gentle and quiet spirit was a piece of beauty in the midst of stench. She taught us how to make these delicious crepes and even baked a cake for us to decorate. During one of our afternoon chats over piping hot tea and freshly baked crepes, we began to discuss the love of God and I retold the story of Hosea and Gomer. Our team wanted to give Zimah the complete picture of God's full and complete love in the midst of our unfaithfulness. Zimah listened, nodded her head, and simply replied, "I enjoy your story, but I am happy to believe what I believe." Heartbreaking. She is missing the full complete love of God and continues to "earn" her salvation by works. Our team continues to pray for her. But in addition to Zimah hearing the good news, was Ferra, a freshly graduated high schooler who's best friend just came to know Jesus.

Island One laid a foundation of Sea Tribe culture and gave me my first baby steps in opening up spiritual conversations. I also, as previously mentioned, experienced the hottest day of my life. Perhaps one person's opinion on the degree of hottness may vary from another's, but what about two people, of Southern blood, attesting to the absurdity of just how hot is hot. It supposed to be nap time, unfortunately I am awakened by the insidious rooster outside the room. I sit up only to realize I am floating in a pool of my own sweat! My hair is pasted to my forehead; I gasp for air. I look over to my teammate, Leigh Ann, who attempting to create a self generated breeze with her striped journal. We ring out our shirts. We slide our legs into the shade. We listen to the rooster. We laugh. What else can you do on the hottest day of your life? Drink water? Maybe. Go swimming? Perhaps. But laugh. Yes. That's what makes the hottest day of your life bearable.

Just outside my home on Pulau Satu.

Walking back home after some singing off the jetty. On most islands, the ocean is the trash can.

Children helping me learn new vocabulary words in bahasa. Any guesses to what word I'm trying to learn??

Cooking that delicious crepe on the floor of Ibu Zimah's kitchen.

Enjoying a visit from Ferra (pink shirt) with hour home stay family.

We all need a backbone

2008-07-19T19:38:00.005-06:00

Before your hearts melt for the Sea Tribe people and create a mess all over your keyboard, let me give you the skeleton that structured this month long tour.

4 days Language school/getting lost in the City

take boat to base camp and say goodbye to air conditioning and milkshakes

Island One: 3 nights home stay and the hottest day of my life

Return to base camp

Island Two: 3 nights home stay and a starry night of joy

Return to base camp for 4 days, flexing our muscles while constructing a fence along the jetty

Celebrate 4th of July with homemade flags drawn with crayon and a bonfire

Island Three: 3 nights home stay and the jetty walk of faith

Return to base camp

Island Four: 3 nights home stay and the ENjoyable Ibu

Return to base camp for debriefing

Return to the City to say goodbye and pick up a few treats

An afternoon in Singapore and an early morning flight back home

The Home Stay breakdown

On each island families invited us into their homes to stay and learn about their culture. Every island home seemed to provide something unique and unexpected. Maybe a mattress, maybe the floor, maybe we all camp out in the living room, maybe we're over water, or perhaps tucked inside the jungle.

The families cooked for us too! Usually a spread of their staple entrees: rice, fish, squid, maybe a shrimp or two, noodles, eggs, and anything fried.

Daily activities included a community service project, volleyball or soccer games, playing with the kids, snack time with really hot sweet tea, engaging in meaningful conversations, and prayer walks around the island.

With this backbone in place I hope each story shared becomes richer and more vibrant.

Me and Leigh Ann (fellow EDGEr) teeming with joy as we parade down the beach during the sunset on Island Two.

A feast for the eyes

2008-07-18T15:30:00.007-06:00

Behold: A feast for your eyes. A few photos to wet the appetite of curiosity.

The pesars (markets) of the islands. These were only located on "bigger" islands that we visited on day trips during our home stays.

Walking the plank on island One. The tide was out. Notice the seaweed drying on the dock. . .want to guess what's for dinner?

A view outside our room on island FOUR. Houses over water blessed us with breezes that cooled us down and pushed away that delicious trash and fish smell.

Walking toward a boat to take us to a market on island TWO. You'd be impressed with the amount of people they can fit on a boat.

Beach at base camp. Delightful.

Sunrise at base camp.

My Bahasa

2008-07-18T13:56:00.000-06:00

Bahasa (Language): the building block of life. As a communication major, and a conversationalist by nature, anything to add to my ability to communicate only made the Sea Tribe experience more enjoyable.

Logging around 18 hours of classroom time plus additional practice in the local mall equipped me with enough words to get from place to place, barter for a better price, and tell someone I had a cat. Pretty important subject matters, I'd say.

My language bridged cultural gaps and communicated to the natives that they are worth the effort to learn something new even though we had translators and guides. Over the period of the four islands I stayed on my vocabulary grew and I provided entertainment for the locals, mixing up my verbs and mispronouncing words.

My language grew in other ways too. My prayer language. We prayed out loud and in conversations. We prayed continually. We prayed for open hearts, guidance, protection from the enemy, for specific needs of the communities, for energy, for the strength to stomach the fried mystery fruit.

God answered. Not in english, not in bahasa, but with open hearts that listened to our stories and asked questions, by leading us to specific people and reminding us of specific parables, by keeping us unified and healthy, by giving us the strength to sing one more song and color one more picture with the kids. The answers go on and on.

Lydia, Alyssa, Leigh Ann, and I with our Bahasa cheat sheets right before we go to the local mall to practice!

Ryan, Ben, Lydia, and I on a city scavenger hunt. First stop, the BCS (Beh, Che, S). We meandered all over the city trying to find our final destination.

Rewind

2008-07-15T09:08:00.001-06:00

Tomorrow I say goodbye to the enchanting land of smelly fruits and laneless streets. With no access to the internet, I have not been able to post the incredible (and humorous) stories that have taken place along the way. Therefore, we'll do a little rewind action, pulling you up to speed on the four sea tribe island homestays and all the in between adventures.

Encounters included, but are not limited to, lots of squid, stinky fried jackfruit, roosters at 3am, squatty potties, jalan jalan (walks), dips in the south china sea, bat caves, late night chats, stars I've never seen before, and a God who is able.

Salamat Tidur! (goodnight)

all my bags are packed

2008-06-10T08:59:00.000-06:00

Some much needed supplies for the trip to Indonesia!

Weeell, sort of! Actually, my bags are the opposite of packed, but I am almost done accumulating all the much needed travel items that will fill the pouches of the massive backpack.

Last week God really impessed on my heart the importance of being prepared. In Matthew 25:1-13, (the parable of the 10 Virgins) we see 10 ladies getting ready for the bridegroom to come! In their excitement they grab their lamps to go wait for him. Five bring extra oil, five decide to go without. The bridegroom is a long time in coming, so long, that the oil has run dangerously low in everyone's lamp! Scripture calls the women who brough an extra jar of oil wise, and they are able to go with the bridegroom, while the other five miss out.

Being prepared ranks around a 2 on my scale of mental functions (1 being I don't care to 10 being I can't stop thinking about it. . .funny how dessert almost always scores a 10).

With my upcoming trip to Indonesia I realized, being prepared is incredibly important. Not only do I want to have the right medicines, extra contacts, heat reducing clothes (do they have these?), I want to be prepared with knowledge of how to communicate the love of Jesus. I need to know about the culture and religion of this people group I will be living with for five weeks! How else will one share a message of truth if they do not know what their audience believes?!

With that said, my days are full of prayers and reading books in preparation to this great adventure. (Along with trying to figure out how to cure my overpacking disease.

Grand Finales

2008-05-22T21:15:00.000-06:00

May is the month of Goodbyes. . .

UCCS spring semester ended the second week of May as I wrapped up my last one on ones, Bible study night, and finished with a pre-summer BBQ.

Here we are filing up water balloons next to the homemade slip n slide at the BBQ.

My Bible Study full of incredible women learning to apply the Word to their lives!

After UCCS came to a close, I attended my third EDGE training Summit in Colorado Springs. Here I joined 130 of my fellow EDGErs who serve on college campus around the US to learn more about discipleship and laboring. In between sessions we played frisbee, ate delicious food, and shared hilarious stories.

Rachel, Nicole, me, and Helen rest in the grass of Glen Eyrie during a break.

A day in Denver with fellow EDGErs.

McDonald's bathroom in Denver needed "tokens" to unlock the door. We stood outside waiting for someone to let us in only to find out the door was never locked.

Nicki and Rebecca, fellow EDGErs smile as we find out no tokens necessary.

The end of EDGE Summit also meant goodbye to my EDGE Corps teammate, Lindsey, who will be venturing off to Alabama for the next step of her life. My favorite ministry activity with Lindsey was going into the dorms and building relationships with freshmen.

Lindsey and I at a Denver Nuggets game in April.

Now the Summer adventures with The Navigators begin!

Meaningful Conversations

2008-05-10T14:01:00.002-06:00

Nav Nights, late night shin-digs, BBQs, the hallways in dorms, Tuesday Lunches. . .

With so many opportunities to connect with people relationally all these Navigator "social" events can be a spring board into deep heart felt conversations. In Proverbs 20:5 it says "The purposes of a man's heart are deep waters, but a man of wisdom draws them out." It became clear to me that every event hosted an opportunity to reveal deeper things within the people in the ministry if I engaged purposefully with them.

It became my prayer before every Nav event: "Lord, let me have a meaningful conversation with someone tonight." My discovery: God is faithful to answer beyond my expectations, and people crave intention and care of another.

A glimpse into the meaningful:

Bowling.late night.
Between frames April (freshman at UCCS) and I talk about our faith journeys. April and I begin to meet weekly to discuss God's Word and his purposes in our life.

Relay for life.even later at night
Walking a track to support funds for Cancer Research, Megan (Navigator sophomore) dialogue with two students about the validity of the Bible, the character of God, and how prayer works.

BBQ.afternoon
Over triple layer chocolate cake and raising our voices over the music and festivities, a student in my Bible Study shares about a painful relationship and walking the path of forgiveness.

Under an oak tree, on a park swing, in the food court of a mall, in a car ride to Ft. Collins, await opportunities to think of someone else and what may be going on under the expression on their face.

Change a life between frames!